People in sales and marketing have a job to do. They have to sell products, they have to make things appealing and attractive to people. They have to make sure that their customers feel at least somewhat special. So they use terms that make their product sound exclusive and make their customers feel special. Sample these words often used by marketers as well as their rather tame everyday explanations:
I heard this somewhere: “we deliver a truly bespoke accounting experience”? Really? ‘Bespoke’ simply means ‘made to order’. So can accounts be anything but bespoke? Can they do my accounts using your numbers for instance? So when they say “bespoke accounting experience” they actually just mean “accounting experience”.
‘Bleeding edge’ is for when ‘cutting edge’ doesn’t cut it anymore. It means latest of the latest and it’s for when someone wants to sound even sharper and keener than cutting edge. However, since this term is closely associated with ultra-new tech that could be unreliable or which carries a high risk, we don’t hear it much.
There is this accent on ‘natural’ and ‘wellness’ and ‘chemical free’ these days. Marketers are anxious to assure us that they are offering us a pure, complete and natural solution for the problems they convince us we have. Holistic is a word that just sounds so… holistic!
This usually means that there are a lot of far better products out there with many better features, design elements and so on. ‘Best in classes simply means best of this lot; which could well mean best of the worst lot. By telling us this Maruti car is ‘best in class’ they are telling us, that this and not a Mercedes is our औकात.
This term is obviously meant to convey some sort of exclusivity or a sense of being carefully chosen, but I always want to know… handpicked as opposed to what? Are other items picked by the teeth? Or using tweezers or a crane perhaps?
Curated is just fancy for handpicked. This is about the marketers trying to imply that the ‘pickers’ are somehow experts in their field. So when they say ‘curated collection’, they're trying to tell us that really smart people did the selection we ought to be grateful or something.
This is also meant to indicate exclusivity; products made to order or especially for a particular customer. So by taking the seam in an inch, changing the dimensions of a lounger or putting your exact name on a name plate, they give you a sense of being personally catered to… when you buy a ‘customised’ product you don’t really mind paying extra; sometimes a lot extra.
An artisan is basically a craftsperson. But now we have artisan beer, artisan bakery, food & cheese, artisan coffee, artisan clothing or furniture. There is no embargo on the use of the word artisan – many marketers use the word just to indicate skill; to indicate handmade or traditionally made items using high quality ingredients. Clever!
Again, meant to convey exclusivity, a capsule collection is a small or limited collection of the essentials. To me, it just seems like they ran out of ideas! Well isn’t that what marketing is about? To make a virtue out of necessity?
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